A new day dawns

I enjoy getting up in the morning more than I used to. This is either because I am enjoying life more or because I don't wake up in the night as often.

I think it's the former which is a good sign. Most nights I wake at three or four o'clock and don't get back to sleep for a long time. That's a classic sign of depression.

Having work to do, even if it is voluntary work, gives you a reason to get up in the morning and also having a timetable to follow helps you to get things done. I still don't want to overdo it. The secret is having a balance.

All we like sheep have gone astray

I have just returned from a walk. I set off with Audrey down Dumb Toms Lane, turned right across the fields to Fourdales and then we went separate ways.

She went off down Tatterthorn to get a paper and I set off back over the fields to Langber. (You can look all this up on Google Map). One of the fields took me past sheep. They must have been hungry because the sight of a human being got them racing across to see if I had any fodder.

Not only that, but in the next field the sheep had got wind of me too. There was a whole flock of them bleating at the top of their voices and heading for the hedge to see if I would feed them. They looked rather sad when they saw I had nothing to offer.

It made me think how easily we run after someone whom we think has something to offer us. And when they don't we give up on them pretty quick. That's human, and sheep, nature I suppose.

A full day

I did it. I filled yesterday with lots of good things.
Some of them were cerebral - writing, thinking and musing.
Others were active - cleaning the kitchen, going for a walk, having a shower, making the tea.
One was a great success - getting my laptop back online after several weeks without the Internet connection working. Now I can talk to you on that as well.
Yes, even though it started with a blank page, yesterday was a full day.

A blank page

Today I looked at my diary and saw a blank page. Not so unusual, you might think. But to me this could be a horrendous problem.
One of the difficulties I had in my last job was time management. Somehow my masters expected me to know how to fill my time and often I didn't. So now I have taken to writing out a timetable for every day and sticking to it as much as possible.
I ask for the Lord's help with each part of it, turning to him as each one is done. I thank Him for helping me to do it and ask for His help to do the next one.
Today I don't have anything planned at all . So I have had to take a blank page and fill it with my own plans and activities. This has not been something I have been good at, but I am going to give it a try.
I will let you know how I have got on when I post a blog tomorrow.

Rush, rush, rush

I am writing this at the Looking Well in Bentham where I work as a volunteer. My role is to help anyone who wants to go onto a computer but isn't sure what to do.

I have dashed here from Hornby because I was called out on my other volunteering job to drive a lady to an appointment.

This happened because one of the other volunteers phoned in sick at the last moment. So I rang here to say I would be late in and went haring off to Hornby.

Interestingly enough this dashing about has had two affects.

1 I really felt a buzz in having to meet timetables and deadlines

2 I got a headache and starting worrying about whether I would be in the right place at the right time.

If I can overcome No. 2 and put everything into No. 1 then things would be better. But I still see this volunteering as helping me get back to work eventually.

What does this afternoon hold? Well, I'll be with the Looking Well group singing at Reid House in Ingleton at 4.00 p.m. till 6.00 p.m. Then there's an Open Doors prayer meeting at 7.00 p.m., before which I have to go home and eat my tea.

I haven't had a day like this for ages. I suppose it is normal life for lots of people.

But for me it's like going to London - nice to visit but I wouldn't like to live there.

I'm no xenophobe...

Have you noticed that whenever people want to say something about people of another colour they start by saying "I'm not a racist, but.."?
Well, I'm not a xenophobe, but I have never been so insulted as when applying for jobs in the recent hiatus when I had to be a job seeker.
On every application form I filled in I had to prove that I was legally able to work in the United Kingdom. It did feel like an insult.
Only once have I not lived in this country. That was when I was a foreign exchange student at Waverly High School, Nebraska, USA in the 1970/71 school year. That was also when I became aware of the wonderful diversity of cultures that this world offers and I have celebrated and enjoyed it ever since.
But to be asked to prove that I have the right to work in my own country, whose air I have breathed for most of my 55 years and whose taxes I have paid for decades really was an insult.
That's why I can understand the frustration of those who are upset at foreign labour being brought into this country when we have such high unemployment.
And I never thought I would see the day when I would shout at Lord Mandelson when he appeared on TV to justify this "Why should we believe anything you say anyway?!" But I have and I did.
Gosh, this is turning into a ranting blog!

Writing, writing, writing

Since a week ago today, when I was deemed unfit for work, it has come to me that the only thing I can do is write. So I keyed into my PC diary as from this morning WRITING - At the PC, on the laptop, at the seaside ANYWHERE! Blog Write anything, anything at all JUST WRITE!

So here I go.
It snowed here during the night and we have a white wonderland again. No sooner has a flake of the white stuff fallen, as it does as I write, than the media starts shouting "Chaos!" What an overused word that is.
On Friday I was chatting on Facebook with a woman who runs a cafe in Montana and she said they get 400 inches of snow a year. What have we got to worry about?!
But what amazed me and made me write it on my Facebook profile status was that she had a webcam set up and I could see her at work and even see the PC she was chatting to me on, between customers. It was weird but wonderful. Whatever next?!